Random 1:
had my last working saturday in the old office. one last week of working late before the move. I really feel the inertia to move and attachment to the place when i started packing my boxes. Change in seating plans will really split up the whole kampung in various places in the new cluster.
I'm beginning to understand the unsettled feelings of our older citizens who were forced to move out of their kampung, and into the urban new towns. This is remotely any close to what they had experienced but I think i can really understand. After all, my emotions are highly capable of exaggerating small occurrences into large-scale happenings.
Random 2:
March is a happy month. The feeling of being able to save a lump sum of $5000 at one time is great.
Random 3:
I happened to encounter somebody who was very good at saving money in a game. He had a lot of money even before we reached the half way mark. however, when calculating his quality of life, he was far behind many of the other players. Many of us tried to ask him to make purchases to increase his life points, but he refused to.
It was noted that he became increasingly concern about the life points when others started passing comments about him being a miser and not being happy even though he had so much money. He eventually started purchasing things that will increase his life points. He was quite unhappy when he realised at the end of the game that he was neither the one with the most money, nor the one with the most life points.
I started to think about my financial status and life.
Random 4:
I went out with CZ 2 weeks ago and I started telling him that I may not pursue my studies eventually.
I was browsing through my past emails and felt so much when I was reading the email threads that I had with some of my professors. Of course, I enjoy and like being intellectually engaged and to think about academia stuff.
On another occasion about 3 days later, I was talking to soulmate about how intellectually disengaged the few of use became ever since we entered the working world. Once in a while, we do talk about it. But its only once in a while, and we logged back in to our work after 2 mins of such talk.
He was also telling me about him giving up the idea of pursuing his phd. I can understand. I hope he dont get suck into the system like we did.
I still have 2 years to think about it and decide. To think about why and whether I really want to do it. I will still continue to save up for it in the mean time.
Random 5:
UK is revamping their policy towards cutting down on foreign students, especially those who could not speak english or is not part of the european union. I was quite concern for a while. Afterall, I'll be affected if I decided to apply for the schools there.
Random 6:
I'll probably use the savings for grad school to travel around for 2-3 months if I decide not to study. I really want to tour around australia and UK. Or I'll have other use for the money if I'm attached by then.
Random 7:
I see a lot of justifications made by one to rationalize one's own actions or re-enforce one's conviction. How some people just deserve to be treated like this, or how the system has not been fair, or how its worth the risk.
And so what's the underlying rationale of justification? Because you know you're wrong and you want to feel like you're right? Or because you want to feel like its worthy because you are starting to have doubts?
People resort to all means and ways to justify because they are desperate, because they want to feel that the decision is right. In general, they want to feel justified for them to be doing certain things, to make certain decisions. I'm no exception.
Nobody is in the position to judge. I guess at the end of the day, you need to be able to bear the consequences of your own action, or decision.
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